I get a lot of free stuff at work. Here’s where most of it ends up.
1. Small Scale-Model of Shea Stadium
Intended Use: Marveling at the wonders of 1960s-era stadium architecture, expressing your loyalty to the New York Mets
Storage for my stress ball
2. 12″ Ruler
Intended Use: Measuring things, drawing straight lines
Substitute for human finger
3. Making the Most of Your Money by Jane Bryant Quinn
Intended Use: Informative reading material that will make you a more financially-stable individual – completely revised and updated for the twenty-first century!
4. Coffee Mug
Intended Use: Holding large quantities of a liquid that will stain my teeth
Holding items that will keep aforementioned liquid from staining my teeth
5. Wal-Mart Tractor Trailer Pez Dispenser
Intended Use: Candy storage
Constant reminder that I have exhausted my supply of Pez and cannot purchase it in New York City at everyday low discount prices